www.zxrworld.co.uk

Ever been caught 'on the job', or had something else happen that made you cringe/laugh?

The funniest one for me is probably when a new girlfriend was giving me a BJ for the first time - in the shower.

It was rather good, but the mood was somewhat ruined when the shower head somehow fell off, smacking her straight on top of her head!

I think I found it a lot funnier than she did!

Good job her bite reflex didn't kick in, in hindsight...

And another one:

One day while I was out, my Mum went in my bedroom because she had to leave something in there.

Unfortunately, so did my dog.

So my dog headed straight for my bin, pulling out a used condom from a girl the night before, and proceeded to run around the house chewing it and dripping and god knows what!

My Mum had to chase the dog down and retrieve the condom and dispose of it...

I only found it funny because she was more embarrassed than I was when she told me about it!

I fell asleep once when i was absolutely leathered.

the missus was not impressed.....especially when she asked 'did you just fall asleep?' to which i replied quite straight faced 'er no' lol.

Lol i got a couple, ive had my mum find several condoms in my old bedroom when i was living at my parents, and beings im im old enough to look back my mum also found one or two crusticated socks + t shirts lol,

also ive had me mum walk in me and my girlfriend ( who is now wife ), i pretty much heard coming through the door i rolled off took the blanket with me as im sure my mum dont wanna see me naked ! and well i left my now wife naked with no blanket looking at my rather embarrased mum, because of that day, the rule was made you knock before entering lol, and yes my mum knocked from then untill i moved out etc man i still think her finding my lying about condoms was worse!

worse one i did was, at a works party back at someones flat, ooh 8 years ago now, i was bonking some girl royally whilest other party going people were stepping over us, man am i ashamed of that but heck man, a ride is a ride, well it is when your 18, i pretty much werent turning anything down with a fanny back then lol, i remember finishing putting on my boxers crawling into the frontroom, quoting f*** me to the 2 guys playing the playstation lol and proceeded to play tenchu ninja assisan, totally ignoring the girl i just bonked, which of course when i left first thing in the morning, the girl asked me at the door " i will call her " lol, f*** no, one night stand baby, ohwell im older, married blah blah all is cool, no more naughtiness take it easy,

Rob

LOL, Went to see a movie 'sleeping with the enemy' at the local cinema. Went in with the girlfriend and the screen was empty. Got randy and ended up having sex during the movie. Stayed till the end even though we'd missed most of it. At the end of the credits this bloke that had been slouching 2 rows in front stood up, said "good evening" and left.

haha lol theres a word for them encrusted socks rob, there called "chuck socks"

superman wrote:haha lol theres a word for them encrusted socks rob, there called "chuck socks"

Whatever its called, just reminds me of the first scene in American pie now lol, jeez that movie is old too lol,



Rob

Imagine the scene.

Gorgeous sunny day, sun is splitting the trees, it's over 25C, your girlfiend's wearing the most f**k off gorgeous skirt and all is well in the world. We've been at the seaside all day we get the train back home. Just as the train's pulling out of the station, we realise we have the entire carriage to ourselves. Not wanting to let the opportunity pass by, the girlfriend starts grabbing my crotch, (which stirs some motion) and as she's wearing a skirt, proceeds to sit astride me. We're really going at it hammer and tongs and she's having a fcuking great time..............when all of a sudden there's the conductor standing beside us. No sooner has he said the phrase "Tickets please", then he turns bright red, mumbles something that sounds like "Sorry" and hurriedly makes his way out of the carriage. We then burst out laughing and continue (and finish) our summer's day train shag.

Still one of the best shags ever.

Zedder wrote:Imagine the scene.

Gorgeous sunny day, sun is splitting the trees, it's over 25C, your girlfiend's wearing the most f**k off gorgeous skirt and all is well in the world. We've been at the seaside all day we get the train back home. Just as the train's pulling out of the station, we realise we have the entire carriage to ourselves. Not wanting to let the opportunity pass by, the girlfriend starts grabbing my crotch, (which stirs some motion) and as she's wearing a skirt, proceeds to sit astride me. We're really going at it hammer and tongs and she's having a fcuking great time..............when all of a sudden there's the conductor standing beside us. No sooner has he said the phrase "Tickets please", then he turns bright red, mumbles something that sounds like "Sorry" and hurriedly makes his way out of the carriage. We then burst out laughing and continue (and finish) our summer's day train shag.

Still one of the best shags ever.

Did you have tickets???

Because this sounds like a bloody good way of fare dodging!!!

Sorry to say the only thing i can further more add to this thread is quoting jamz sig again

Have YOUUU NOOOOOO KNeEeEeES

Ok so me and the GF having a good time in the missionary position with her on top one afternoon, didnt realise parents were still in as was young. Little sister comes marching upstairs, me and the GF too busy to notice and she busts into the room. We instantly stop as covered by blanket and the GF pretends to be asleep.

My sister then starts a full blown conversation about some random sh*te bout going down the shops, then who should walk up stairs my ex GF who was the daughter of a family friend so was visiting, she was a bit older than me about 3 years nothing much but at 15 is quite a bit. Starts to join in with the convo and tells me to get up cause i'm a lazy sod, the ex pops over and rips the quilts off just as my nan comes up to use the toilet and all 3 see everything, my ex nearly was cryin, my nan nearly had a heart attack and my sister was pissing herself laughin

damn ive had a sheltered life ...


*whistles innocently*

the other week...
me and the gf on their drive in the country getting it on, been there so long the motion sensor lights have gone out...
little did we know that her dad was in the garage with his watch collection, comes out, turning the motion lights on.. and theres me with his daughter bent over in the drive...
the best thing i could do to calm him down was to say "we were using a condom" lol

zxrman wrote:Ok so me and the GF having a good time in the missionary position with her on top one afternoon, didnt realise parents were still in as was young. Little sister comes marching upstairs, me and the GF too busy to notice and she busts into the room. We instantly stop as covered by blanket and the GF pretends to be asleep.

My sister then starts a full blown conversation about some random sh*te bout going down the shops, then who should walk up stairs my ex GF who was the daughter of a family friend so was visiting, she was a bit older than me about 3 years nothing much but at 15 is quite a bit. Starts to join in with the convo and tells me to get up cause i'm a lazy sod, the ex pops over and rips the quilts off just as my nan comes up to use the toilet and all 3 see everything, my ex nearly was cryin, my nan nearly had a heart attack and my sister was pissing herself laughin

PMSL!!!

What a nightmare!!!

Alright so I was 15 at a party in a mates house, I'd been kind of getting it on with this girl for some time but nothing serious, also her friend has a real thing for me. After a few drinks (and some other things) me and said girls end up in my mates brothers bedroom. One thing leads to another and before I know it I have the girl I've been seeing trying to suck the pison from my knob and her friend (who looking back on it was much fitter than the one I was seeing, ahh the stupidity of youth) sitting on my face, there is lots of licking and fun for a bit then a happy endind and we decide to rejoin the party. Nothing embarrassing there.

Fast forward a few hours and I'm in the mood again so I invite the fit friend back to the room. Now I should point out at this point that the reason I wasn't seeing her was because she was known as a bit of a scab, though to be fair she was a lovely girl and still is, its just her family weren't very well off, and you all know how harse kids are. So me and her are in the room and I undress her, so she is lying on the bed and I am drinking from the furry cup, next thing I know the door flys open and the light turns on, there in the door way is half the people at the party, in shock and embarrasment I grab the duvet and hide under it despite still being fully clothed, this of course left her completely exposed to the twenty people in the room. I didn't hear the end of it until I left school.

But the thing that I found the most strange was the girl who I was seeing got really upset and not that I had been screwing her friend, no, she was upset she had seen her friend naked, I didn't try and explain that we had all been naked together just hours before. Women are such a mystery.

hmm thats not embarrassing that cool
2 birds @ the same time you should have tried for another get together with em