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RedexRobB wrote:
Her dad runs his own programming business, is an area manager for BT, is a local councillor (liberal demo) and is also some sort of consultant. If you ask me i think hes done well in life and through that thinks he knows it all.

But is he actualy happy and enjoying life?

Most people I know who have the wife/house/nice car/highpaid job are miserable, stressed to fk and only focused on getting as much money in the bank as they can.

If they're lucky they'll realise that they take all your bank cards out of your pockets when you're dead. Most people never realise that - or even if they do they care too much what their neighbours or family will think...

Jamz wrote:
If they're lucky they'll realise that they take all your bank cards out of your pockets when you're dead. Most people never realise that - or even if they do they care too much what their neighbours or family will think...

Dont get me started on that, he compares her to her friends and other peoples kids cos they have 1st degrees and are in highly paid jobs, which as far as im concerned is one thing you can ever do, is compare your children. One of her friends the same age already has a house, and he made a good point of reminding her that, she promptly reminded him that she was given 50K off her parents (also a business owner) and another 40K from her nan! And that previously to that she never worked abroad in europe. Apparently thats no excuse!

I can only image hes happy.....making other peoples lives a misery.

i wish my family had money to give me.. infact i'm pretty sure if i won a good 20 million on euromillions i'd have the life of my time! i'd promote all my friends to millionaires buy fast bikes and faster cars, purchase a nice big house and turn it into my dream house... Garage.. in the lounge.. lol. My very own demontweeks parts desk in the kitchen.. and a spray booth in the loo. i'd have a that was actually 3 goldwings stood next to each other.... kitchen worksurfaces by SnapOn...

back on topic:
i dont know, you cant really push her into not listening to her family. eventually though if you just keep offering your points of view and they are reasonable she might come around. just try not to let your relationship suffer because you dont see eye with her stepdad which will probably be the hardest to do.

yeah i just sit through it and as you say give my point of view, i always try and see it from her parents point of view too, and explain to her, makes it a bit easier for her to deal with iv found.

I doubt i will ever eye to eye with the step father tho, hes too old and set in his ways i think although he has recently given a me a programming project for me to do which i rally appreciate as its gonna give me the leg up i need to get into a serious job.

RedexRobB wrote: I doubt i will ever eye to eye with the step father tho, hes too old and set in his ways i think although he has recently given a me a programming project for me to do which i rally appreciate as its gonna give me the leg up i need to get into a serious job.

is he paying you properly?

Have you thought about self-employment? i dont know about other peeps but i really couldnt live any other way.

Xphyral wrote:Have you thought about self-employment? i dont know about other peeps but i really couldnt live any other way.

+1

certainly couldn't work in a 9 to 5.. would drive me nuts .. i've walked out of nearly every "job" ive had ..

having said that, starting out self employed requires a lot of self discipline, its easy to slack off, do nowt and go down the pan.

hes not paying me, but to be honest im just grateful for the opportunity as i really need it after cocking my degree up.

I have considered becoming self emplyed but not sure what i would do to be honest. Ive done the 9 till 5 thing and routine kills me.

All fun and games!

If your a programer than you'll need a 9-5 job for a good few years. Give it a few years and join a bigger company and you'll be working from home.

I meet a lad on a VB training course a while ago who now works in spain and flys back to london every 4 weeks then works in spain while gettings his london wage. I'm planning on going traviling in the next 12 months and i think that i'll be contracted some work while on the move. Thats the great thing about computers you can work ANYWHERE in the world as long as your employer is willing to let you do it.

You really need to start some big projects though, uni work and actual work work is 100% diffrent.

Im not really a programmer, if anything i hate it. Im definately a hardware guy! Its just getting your foot in the door after uni.

never do anything your good at for free honestly.

I find working in any IT area a rather boring job(for me, i like working with my hands far too much), i'm an experienced(or was) computer forensic and was self-employed doing pc repair when i was in college because i got sick of people asking me to fix their computers for free because i knew what i was doing so i started charging for it and kept myself pretty well floated during college with more free time than my mates. You wouldnt expect a mechanic to work for free so why should anyone with a different skill do the same? at the end of the day if you can do something many others cant, dont work for free and thats all self-employment is.

Getting your foot in the door can either be easy or very difficult and i would say working part or full time to start with, doing something other than the line of work you wish to set yourself up in business doing while doing some freelance work in your free time is the best way to start. It's hard work but if you work it pays off after a few years, maybe even sooner if your lucky not doing the same things job/self-employment wise is an important one i learned, 1. you have a competition conflict between yourself and your employer and 2. if you've been coding for 8 hours straight you hardly want to go home and do the same damn thing for someone else.

And i dont know anyone who got their foot in any door by doing something for nothing, mostly they just couldnt cope with a workload they weren't being compensated for.