Motorcycle Reserved Parking At Supermarkets (BLOG CHALLENGE)
Posted: Mon Apr 23, 2007 9:52 am
Motorcycle Reserved Parking At Supermarkets (BLOG CHALLENGE)
[RANT ON]
The Tesco's store in Redditch has two measely car parking spaces out of hundreds, which are marked up and reserved for Motorcycle Parking.
It's not like they're right in front of the entrance, because fat pregnant cows and wheely-spakkas get those spaces, but next in line is us bikers, if we can all fit into those 2 spaces.
Except almost every fucking time I've ever been there, there are cars parked in those two spaces!
It boils my piss!
Yesterday, as I pulled up, there were two cars there as usual, and the owner was sat in one of them.
I pulled straight across the spaces, and made sure my bike was blocking both of the cars in. I normally do this, and then as I go into the store will tell Customer Services that I'm blocking cars in and tough titty if anyone complains.
So I locked the bike, got off, took my helmet off and walked away from the bike, without even looking at Tithead NUmber 1 in his car.
I got halfway towards the entrance before Tithead pipes up behind me.
"Can you move your bike? I'm blocked in!"
I spun around, probably frothing at the mouth a little (not that I was trying to initiate an argument or anything), and my Righteous Biking Rage kicked in fully.
"WHAT???? That's BIKE PARKING! Tough titty!" Shouts I, storming back towards Tithead, who was hanging out of his open cars (a green Saxo) window.
I'd pretty much lost it at that point, so it's all a bit of a blur. I think he tried to say something about getting out of his car, but I didn't even let him finish! f*** him, it was some weak pussy protest anyway, and I was the one with the carbon knuckles on my gloves!
Now, it's extremely rare that I get angry, and even when I do I'll just go very quiet and calm. Here I was, with my jaw going and adrenaline through the roof - I wanted a fight, and I'd have kicked his ass for every biker who's ever had their space stolen by a car!
Hell yeah - I was going proper Bananaman!!!
I decided to move my bike forwards, having made my point, so it was just blocking Tithead Number 2's car.
I muttered loudly about "... if you can't read the fucking signs that's your tough toad..." and other provocative stuff. There was no way he was getting out of his car though - and he was much bigger than me! Ha-ha! I win, Fatso!
In hindsight, I should have just ignored him and left my bike there. Even better, I should have walked back and blatantly taken a picture of his registration, just incase he ran the bike over or something daft.
As I mentioned, this toad happens a lot at Tesco's, but this was the first time I'd actually met one of the Titheads. Even when I'd done my shopping as slowly as possible, I've got back before the car drivers - which is a shame. maybe they were hiding until after I'd gone though?
But even then I have a solution. I write a helpful note and put it on their windscreen for when they gat back.
Usually it's something like "YOU ARE NOT A BIKE - YOU ARE A Camel. HAVE A NICE DAY."
Then I put a smiley face. Because I'm nice like that.
What I would REALLY like to do, is get a load of bikers together one day, and get everyone to block the cars in, while we sit there for a few hours chatting and drinking coffee or something.
Just to make a fucking point.
Bike parking is for BIKES!!!
Fucking car-driving titheads.
[RANT OFF]
[RANT ON]
The Tesco's store in Redditch has two measely car parking spaces out of hundreds, which are marked up and reserved for Motorcycle Parking.
It's not like they're right in front of the entrance, because fat pregnant cows and wheely-spakkas get those spaces, but next in line is us bikers, if we can all fit into those 2 spaces.
Except almost every fucking time I've ever been there, there are cars parked in those two spaces!
It boils my piss!
Yesterday, as I pulled up, there were two cars there as usual, and the owner was sat in one of them.
I pulled straight across the spaces, and made sure my bike was blocking both of the cars in. I normally do this, and then as I go into the store will tell Customer Services that I'm blocking cars in and tough titty if anyone complains.
So I locked the bike, got off, took my helmet off and walked away from the bike, without even looking at Tithead NUmber 1 in his car.
I got halfway towards the entrance before Tithead pipes up behind me.
"Can you move your bike? I'm blocked in!"
I spun around, probably frothing at the mouth a little (not that I was trying to initiate an argument or anything), and my Righteous Biking Rage kicked in fully.
"WHAT???? That's BIKE PARKING! Tough titty!" Shouts I, storming back towards Tithead, who was hanging out of his open cars (a green Saxo) window.
I'd pretty much lost it at that point, so it's all a bit of a blur. I think he tried to say something about getting out of his car, but I didn't even let him finish! f*** him, it was some weak pussy protest anyway, and I was the one with the carbon knuckles on my gloves!
Now, it's extremely rare that I get angry, and even when I do I'll just go very quiet and calm. Here I was, with my jaw going and adrenaline through the roof - I wanted a fight, and I'd have kicked his ass for every biker who's ever had their space stolen by a car!
Hell yeah - I was going proper Bananaman!!!
I decided to move my bike forwards, having made my point, so it was just blocking Tithead Number 2's car.
I muttered loudly about "... if you can't read the fucking signs that's your tough toad..." and other provocative stuff. There was no way he was getting out of his car though - and he was much bigger than me! Ha-ha! I win, Fatso!
In hindsight, I should have just ignored him and left my bike there. Even better, I should have walked back and blatantly taken a picture of his registration, just incase he ran the bike over or something daft.
As I mentioned, this toad happens a lot at Tesco's, but this was the first time I'd actually met one of the Titheads. Even when I'd done my shopping as slowly as possible, I've got back before the car drivers - which is a shame. maybe they were hiding until after I'd gone though?
But even then I have a solution. I write a helpful note and put it on their windscreen for when they gat back.
Usually it's something like "YOU ARE NOT A BIKE - YOU ARE A Camel. HAVE A NICE DAY."
Then I put a smiley face. Because I'm nice like that.
What I would REALLY like to do, is get a load of bikers together one day, and get everyone to block the cars in, while we sit there for a few hours chatting and drinking coffee or something.
Just to make a fucking point.
Bike parking is for BIKES!!!
Fucking car-driving titheads.
[RANT OFF]
