Windy Isle (more of a story than a rant, but close enough).

[Vard66]

Not fair, is it?

If it's not pissing it down, it's blustery as f**k, and I'm not sure which is more unpleasant to ride in, really.

I'm fecked off with being blown about the road, into the paths of oncoming Transits, or into houses and church grounds.

Someone go invent some form of bubble shield-majig that protects us all from weather and impacts. I would love you forever.

And to top it all, we've got to deal with the currents of air drawn along by these effing great high-sided lorries that thunder around.

I left my house earlier, to go to work.

Riding along the road out of my village, I realised my lanyard strap was free, and was batting about, twatting into the side of my helmet, so I decided to stop at the junction at the top of the road to take it off and pocket it.

Now there was a nice firm breeze blowing along the A4 this afternoon, so when I stopped at the junction, it was broadsiding my bike, and putting real strain on my left leg to hold the bike up on a hill, with the wind blowing the side of it like a sail.

I stopped, gloves off, right foot on the brake, left holding the bike, and started to undo my helmet.

I got as far as the point at which the chin of the helmet passes your vision, at which point one of the aforementioned fucking great big lorries thundered by, dragging a huge gust of wind with it.

I was already struggling against the stiff breeze to hold the bike up, and this pushed me over the edge.

So there I was, sat at a junction, gloves flew off the bike into a ditch, helmet up, half on, half off my head, with the chinpiece obscuring my vision, both hands on my helmet, and I'm going over.

Ever...
So...
Slowly.

Straining with my leg, I let go of the helmet and make my most monumental efforts to get the bike back up, but I'm already past the point of no return, and all I can do is lower her gently instead of dropping her.

Petrol goes everywhere, still haven't worked that one out.

Carbs flood, engine dies.

Brilliant.

After heaving it back up, I realise there are several pieces of grit embedded in the paint on the tank, thanks to someone putting some nice orange sandy grit at the end of the road (for no reason that I've been able to ascertain), and I spend a moment or two prying those out, until I realise that I should be at work in ten minutes.

Then I toad myself because I can't see where the fuel came from, and spend another ten minutes trying to make sure it's ok and it's not leaking.

So of course, the bike won't start, having just flooded and died.

And after all this, I get to have a lovely blustery, gusty, hair-raising ride, sometimes even on the right side of the road, and once more get to enjoy the magic that is An-Old-Man-Driving-A-Ratty-Fiesta-Round-A-Roundabout.
Is it just me, or are they becoming really, really common?

I'm thinking of offering to host a crash course driving programme, titled 'Can't Indicate, Won't Indicate' at some point, I just need a decent influence in the Beeb. Perhaps I should do a spin off titled 'Shouldn't Drive, Is Driving anyway'. I dunno, I'm just sounding ideas off.

Someone sell me an AK and a sling. If I ride round with it on my back, noone would mess with me. except the PoPo.

All that said, I did find someone had left something at work that took my mind off it.

It contained this picture.

http://lh5.ggpht.com/_MG_i3tGmaUw/R0pYo ... 488652.jpg

Didn't make my day, but it did distract me from it...

[masterofinsanity]

what was the pic? link don't work.

[Vard66]

Annoyying. it was a pair of rather tastefully endowed, but rather scantily clad ladies.

[littleblondie]

oh dear sounds like you had a very bad day... i also have major trouble battling against the wind on the roads.. find it throws me all over the place... so totally sympathise with you!!! :smt013 those planks who do the guess which way im going with my invisible indicators need to go back to driving school for sure!!

By the way, maybe ur link should have included some nice pics of hunky men for us ladies who may appreciate.. then it may have worked lol he he!!

Did u find out where the leak was from?

Keep smiling!!

[masterofinsanity]

looking at photos of scantily clad women i hate to think where the leak was from

[Vard66]

Baz, Baz, Baz. No. Just no.

A valid point, blondie, but I have to admit that my choices of hunky chappies would probably be limited by my lack of interest in them.
It'd probably go 'Oh look. He's pretty muscly.' And that's about it.

So I shall leave choices of those pictures to those who have a greater taste for the choice of them.