ADVICE

superman · Post by **superman** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:37 pm

Hi guys, this is none bike related, but im at a loose end...
have any of you guys ended a long term relationship?
mine has broke up on friday and to say the least im gutted,,, 7 years and that it..

how do you get over it without feeling bad,,, i dont fancy goin up town nailing other birds bcos i dont think it will help, at the moment i cant even contemplate being with anyone else. darn it.
i feel like the day i had to take my dog to be put down..

Post by **masterofinsanity** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:40 pm

been divorced 2 n half times mate, if there's no way of reconciliation then go up town and shag some birds.seriously i went through hell with my first divorce and god knows how i made it through but i did and you will.

Post by **Jamz** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:01 pm

Going out on the shag never appealed to me, either...

Best thing is to let it all go to pieces for a while* - drink heavily.

Then stop, and carry on with your life, because it will get better and easier - and what it comes down to is that if you were meant to be together, you never would have split!

You may also want to put a breathiliser on your phones for a while. Because you WILL try calling/texting her. :wanker

*Or there's probably a more constructive way like throwing yourself into activities like rock climbing, US Football, knitting, hill-running, fox-hunter stabbing etc.

superman · Post by **superman** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:14 pm

ahh so there is no easy quick fix way through is there. its hard as fk, but at least i aint alone, its kind of nice to know others have been there before me.
im really resisting the urge to ring her text her. i think that will just put me back to stage 1....

Post by **Jamz** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:22 pm

superman wrote:ahh so there is no easy quick fix way through is there. its hard as fk, but at least i aint alone, its kind of nice to know others have been there before me.
im really resisting the urge to ring her text her. i think that will just put me back to stage 1....

This is an illustration of the pain and humiliation that phoning an ex after a split will bring:

You have been warned.

Gemini · Post by **Gemini** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 2:49 pm

i wouldnt advise shaggin loadsa birds or hitting the bottle cuz neither will help

how about takin up a new interest? keep yourself busy, keep your mind occupied

and in time u will feel better,

i went through a nasty split years back and thought i couldnt get thru it, but fortunately i had loadsa good mates around me and my bike

now i look back on it, in a better relationship (marriage) and a better person

gem

superman · Post by **superman** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:18 pm

yea your right, thing is she was really nice not a bitch in particular althoe my mind may be fogged up at the moment, also the fact she was my first real love which isnt helping the situation.
what sort of time frame are we looking at here?
i really thought i was the only chap this happened to at first cos everyone you ask just shrugs and sez ahhh i didnt think anything about it, was as easy as turning a light off.. i wish! lol.

ahhh you can always rely on james to illustrate a savage point lol. ill not try phoning or texting as i dont think it will help at all.

Post by **masterofinsanity** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:20 pm

mate i specialize in nutters and even they are hard to get over (well some of them)

Post by **rene** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:21 pm

Every man should no the answer to this question.

Shag her best mate, sorted.

Post by **masterofinsanity** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:30 pm

dya know i actually thought about that saturday night, her best mate, her best mates mate and her best mates sister, one at a time or all together i weren't gonna be fussy.

Post by **Jamz** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:48 pm

Well Superman, if you want to hear the Best Case Scenario - I'm probably living it!

I had a huuuuuuge split with a gf who I'd been with longer than anyone ever - for various reasons even Police got involved at one stage, so very much an enforced loss of contact.

It was -ing awful. Not least of all because I was losing everything and going bankrupt at the time as well, then had my bike stolen on top of it all...

It was hard, but things picked up and I got through it, and go together with another girl. We split after about 9 months, and I can honestly say I wasn't all that bothered, because no split was going to be as bad as the one before. I figured it happens, and that's life.

Strangely, it was about that time when the original one got back in touch with me, too. We emailed a bit, sent a few text messages, and ended up meeting up again... and now we're back together and happier than ever!

It's very unlikely this will happen to you or anyone else - but the point is you'll be fine somewhere down the line... and maybe you will get her back sometime in the future. Whatever happens, for the moment you have to learn to accept it's over, and learn from it. Worry about yourself and your own life for a while, and just see where life takes you.

Davw · Post by **Davw** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 4:03 pm

shagging her best mate whilst good fun (maybe) might fall into the "burning your bridges" or "ALL OUT REVENGE" category so taking this approach really depends on what your feelings are towards her and the logic for the split.

If you beleive the split is for the best (answering honestly) then the best approach is to wish her well in the future - get the bike fettled and enjoy the warmer weather and your freedom with a few hard core blasts on the bike or whatever else you do to let your hair down. Anything else you do doenst really matter as you beleive the split is in both of your interests so drink and rampant shagging are great ways of letting off steam and what she thinks of all of this is a bit irrelavant as the split is in everybodies interest

However, if you dont think the split is what you want then that is a completely different deal and blasting around the country side whilst shagging your brains out (her best mate, mates or otherwise) may not be the best approach to convincing her she has made a mistake!!!

There isnt any fixed time table for all of this and to any of your friends who say "naw I just got over her instantly" are bullshitting and cant tell you how they really felt. I have to say this is easily the hardest question I have seen in the 9 months I have been using the site - good luck mate.

superman · Post by **superman** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 5:02 pm

naa nailing her best mate is out the question because 1. i dont get on with her lol and 2 i couldnt do that to her i guess. i would feel too guilty...
wish i could snap my fingers and be done thoe i tell ya. would make things so much more simple lol.

Post by **rene** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 5:21 pm

superman wrote:naa nailing her best mate is out the question because 1. i dont get on with her lol

since when has a man ever actually got along with a women longer than he *Physically* needs to?

Post by **Jamz** » Tue Jan 27, 2009 9:55 am

rene wrote:
superman wrote:naa nailing her best mate is out the question because 1. i dont get on with her lol
since when has a man ever actually got along with a women longer than he *Physically* needs to?

You wait!

One day you'll fall in love, and it'll make bashing her back doors in even better!

www.zxrworld.co.uk

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